doof.me.uk

Something very strange happened this Tuesday afternoon. I’m pretty sure it’s nearly May so why is it snowing??

While I was in Norway I noticed something very alarming. They have two kinds of pedestrian crossing sign! The left-hand one looks like a normal crossing sign with the gentleman going about his business in the regular manner. But the one on the right is a sinister crossing. That guy is a) wearing a hat […]

This is the most succinct summary of every Youtube discussion ever:

The last time I was in Taipei I bought some Oolong tea from an old lady on a market stall near the Longshan temple. When I got home and tried it it was sooo good. It’s a lot lighter than normal Oolong tea and tastes kind of… buttery. The tea is rolled up into tiny […]

On Monday night I finally fulfilled my dream of going for a walk on the M25. The atmosphere was surprisingly jovial. By chance the guy in the blue mini had stopped just behind his driving instructor. Definitely looking forward to having a five minute walk to work.

Oh noes! Vegetable scrubbing carrot’s eyes have fallen out! No need to panic though as I performed emergency surgery using some glue.

So my work trips have taken a turn for the exotic and I’m in Taipei all week visiting a contract manufacturer (more on this later). The hotel has the very latest innovations in toilet technology! Looks like a normally toilet at first glance but behold the highly complex electronic control panel! Thankfully full instructions are […]

At work last we week were subjected to an interminable two day “New Hire Workshop” despite having worked there for nearly three years. I learned all sorts of useful things like how to “ideate” and that I should be “training at the empowerment gym”. Hmm. Anyway, to pass the time I started writing a story […]

Out in Uxbridge buying lunch today who did I see but the almighty God-Emperor of Great Britain and prospective MP, Boris Johnson! In real life he’s somewhat shorter and paler than I imagined. Unfortunately I was so overcome with awe I didn’t go up and get my photo taken with him before the minder hustled […]

A long long time ago I found an acorn next to the reservoir near our house. I carried it all the way home and planted it in my flower patch at the end of the garden. And now look: it grew into a mighty oak tree! At the time I planned to build a tree […]